seasons.

today i am missing the seasons that no one is privy to. the changes of the interior. the paths i have tread. the road i am wandering now, traced by fate and the lingering lives i have left behind. it seems everywhere i turn today there are reminders. of moments of simplicity. when i made careless decisions that have lead me to this place. into this space where everything i own and everything i am is all that i want and need. and yet i have given up so much. so many. and this innocence now gone, scratches at my limbs. i have caved in. and now i must face my sins with bowed head and palms bleeding. i miss my beautiful friends. i miss the bridge that holds solid these dreams. the forest that was always able to witness my rebirth. the desert that gave me movement and healed my head. i want the moment i gave myself away to erase. i want my hands to fold steady once again. i want the stupidity of growing pains to lessen the weight now straining my heart. without the wings surrounding me now i would not be breathing. in a space such as this with no home no love no standstill i continue. i must. because if i gave up everything i love...it's got to be for something. it's got to be for this. [i am steps away from it. inches before my face. i can taste it. let this be the last leg of the race...]

xx.kg.